I told my friend about being abused as a child, and now they don't talk to me?

A genuine friend wouldn't turn her back on you & refuse to speak to you simply because you confided in her about something painful & traumatic which wasn't your fault. Also, I can't imagine someone who is supposed to be a friend, telling you that they can't understand your grief over your father's ping based on your mother still being alive like you said. I feel that there is a bit more to this. Maybe the reason she is ignoring you isn't what you think? Maybe she is upset that you didn't confide in her before or maybe she doesn't believe you? These are just suggestions to show that it may not be what you think. Either way, my advice would be to leave her alone. If she does contact you, maybe she'll let you know the reasons for the strange behaviour. If she doesn't, I suggest you distance yourself from her. So sorry for your losses hon.